Over the past week, we ran a technology Haiku contest, because hey, we all love technology, and who doesn’t love Haiku? We had about 60 excellent submissions and set our judges to work evaluating each on three criteria:

originality
humor
thoughtfulness

The criteria was determined before the contest and posted on the page in the contest rules. Admittedly, judging a haiku contest is like judging a jazz dance recital or beat-boxing championship, but I think our judges did a fine job determining the winners. Here’s how the judging worked:

Each of three judges came up with a score from 1 to 10 for each of the three criteria. That led to a score out of 30 for each poem for each judge. The final score for each poem was determined by adding the three individual judges scores together, leading to a total score out of 90. Since this was a contest for techies, we made sure that all three judges were sufficient geeky that they could understand even the haikus that amounted to code fragments (which were very clever).

The winning High-Tech Haiku was by submitted by Todd:

My phone has me leashed
Like a dog tied to a tree
Barking constantly
– Todd

It had everything you want in a haiku, it is simple and straight forward, rhythmic, funny, and thoughtful. It is particularly effective if you imagine it being read by Mr Miyagi (the wise teacher from the Karate Kid) to impart some kind of deep lesson on Daniel-san. Todd wins the $250 gift card. Congratulations Todd!

The second and third place entries were as follows:

Kids whining, fighting
Swiping iphone to mute them
There’s an app for that?
– Chad

A ghost from the past
Haunting present and future
Legacy systems
– Dave

There’s no prize for placing or showing, but you do win the admiration of your peers. And of course, if Todd is unable to perform his haiku champion duties for any reason, Chad or Dave can step in. Congratulations to Todd and thanks to everyone who entered, or stopped by to read some haiku.

public class Haiku {
public static void main(String[]
args) { System.out.print(); }
– Michael

GPS breakdown —
torrent’s sound indicating
the end of the trail
– Pham

climbing the mountain
in search of a small beach tube —
geocaching time
– Pham

“Now” is now “then, ” its
Data is now delayed and
Free for all to see
– Max

In data, find truth
In content, find contentment
In life, work, find peace
– Max

Final change complete!
For sure it will work this time.
Segmentation fault
– Brent

<haiku> ::= <end> <mid> <end>
<mid> ::= say seven syllables
<end> ::= produce five sounds
– Raymond

Haikus are like tweets
Beautiful commentaries
But they don’t make sense
– Aaron

for line in poem:
if syllables( line ) not in
[5, 7]: throw Fail
– Ryan

O! sweet discontent
My love’s mpeg – this content
Is not supported
– Phil

Hard-driven, rammed
From reality’s embrace
To pixeled frontiers
– Phil

Data swarms like flies
The World Wide Web a bounty-
So where’s the spider?
– Phil

Always protect
Your PIN from prying eyes-
Your cash is counting
– Phil

Price, volume, time, date,
Architecture’s in a state,
Conflate, calibrate.
– Max

Volumes through the roof
Can’t afford to be aloof
Apply appliance
– Max

Not enough options
For too much options data
Makes data later
– Max

Ctrl+Alt+Delete
When this Window to the world
Freezes on her face
– Phil

data over load
see rapids instead of plane
looking for solace
– Mat

we race to zero?
focus blurs the real issue
retain big picture
– Mat

integration argh!
too many required systems
solace found in one
– Mat

have faith this cloud never rains,
data’s safe the data never drains
– Nitin
Munch realized it
Long before our mobile phones
We’re Livin’ the Scream!
– Ken

unix to unix copy
improbable cyber dawn
to web brightened day
– RP

Download the torrent,
download the crack. Wait, oh no!
mom’s gonna see that.
– Erin

Increasing data
Faster speeds at lower cost
Think Appliances
– Sumeet

twitter facebook GOOG
oh how my mac loves a song
harmony is now !
– Eugenius

want simpler data
go into the clouds they say
what about cloud fails?
– Eugenius

Wifi disconnect
Hour glass spins infinitely
Must Dlink reboot
– Paul

pub sub rub a dub
in the tub of tech we swim
will we ever win?
– Eugene

apps schmaps maps schnapps laps
yesterday is the PC
tomorrow bring fun
– Eugene

Procedures and Strings
Unbound processes and thoughts
Methodless, its bloat
– Steve

needs unrequited
foes and friends unconsulted
success there is not
– Steve

Service bus I see
Pending messages sky high
Solace rescue me
– Craig

Sanding hardened steel
No respirator on face
Taste blood and metal
– Guillermo

To be fast is good
But fastest with no control
Means all can be lost
– Dave

To my dearest John
I am so sorry but I
[message truncated]
– Justin

Windows acting funny
Pressing control alt delete
iBook purchase time
– Jonathan

Ignorantly bliss
Laptop cries for battery
Dead when needed most
– Feyi

Data tsunami
Swelling swelling swelling splash
#Bigdataproblems
– Jackie

Data traveling
Never ending info sent
Lost in sea of codes
– Feyi

A ghost from the past
Haunting present and future
Legacy systems
– Dave

You say “TELL YOUR FRIENDS!”
But they will kill my chances!
Counterproductive.
– RN

I know I can read
But this captcha disagrees
Have to try again
– Michael

For a minute there
GPS Radio(head)
I lost myself – not
– RN

Moore’s Law crescendo
Desktops vanish into clouds
Of dust and storage
– RN

currencies in flux
sell the euro/usd
til the risk is gone
– Howard

Kids whining, fighting
Swiping iphone to mute them
There’s an app for that?
– Chad

High frequency trades
My algo can beat up yours
Picking up pennies
– Alexi

My phone has me leashed
Like a dog tied to a tree
Barking constantly
– Todd

Pub and sub, odd phrase
Not a beer and sandwich place
Messaging for all!
– Jeff

Clouds hold your data
Where does your data reside
When it is sunny?
– William

GPS Broken
Deep introspection needed
Lost myself again
– Larry

iPad buzzing again
We’re slaves to our devices
How did this happen?
– Nick

Million streams, thousand hosts
Ocean of bytes, I wander
Solace in my mind
– Denis

My PC Screen? Blue.
Nothing works. It’s given up.
Should have bought a Mac
– Bill

Data is streaming
teeming, scheming, multiples
perpetually
– RP

Email rings a bell
Urgent? Spam? I must know now!
Pavlov’s dog lives on.
– Bill

My data is gone
Water and laptops don’t mix
I should have backed up
– Bill

What is middleware?
Data flowing in real time
Happy apps and peeps
– Greg

Your Facebook updates
Listing trivia of your day
I don’t want to know
-Edward

Larry Neumann

From 2005 to 2017, Mr. Neumann was responsible for all aspects of strategic, corporate, product and vertical marketing. Before Solace, he held executive marketing positions with TIBCO and Oracle, and co-founded an internet software company called inCommon which was acquired by TIBCO. During his tenure at TIBCO, Mr. Neumann played a key role in planning company strategic direction relating to target markets and candidate acquisitions.